We read the Quran so you don’t have to.

LOLmuslim Friday — on time this week!

with 17 comments

Then again, when’s the Big Guy not pissed?

Here’s what’s what:

  • Maybe I’ve been too busy following this election coverage — lately it’s been less heart burn and more laughter — but I totally missed this in the news:  Three remanded over Mohammad book publisher fire.  Yipes.
  • Just in case I don’t pick on other religions enough: Hindus are batshitass crazy, too.  Feel like reading something super depressing?  Clicky.
  • If I hear the following words and phrases ever again, I’m going to slit my fucking wrists:
    1. Maverick
    2. Bless / blessing /blessed
    3. Fannie-and-Freddie
    4. Hockey mom
    5. Nuke-u-lar
    6. Earmarks
    7. Bridge to Nowhere
      and, of course,
    8. God, especially when coupled with #2 (my eyes are still rolling from last night’s debate)
  • Pat Condell’s video about shariah law got booted from YouTube.  And, um, then I read this article about how the Kuwait Human Rights Society wants YouTube to remove all anti-Islamic videos.  Maybe the KHRS needs to get its fucking priorities in order?
  • Is anyone planning on going to the American Atheists National Convention in April?  KafirBoy and I have been talking about it.  We’ve never been and it seems like a pretty good excuse to get out of town.  Anyone?  Anyone?  Is this thing on?

Happy Friday, everyone, and I’ll be back with a little somethin’ on chapter 12 before you know it.  (Is it 6 yet?  I’m so ready to get my weekend started.)


Written by kafirgirl

October 3, 2008 at 11:58 am

Posted in Friday

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17 Responses

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  1. I don’t know if LOLFriday is really the best name……. How about WTFF!


    October 3, 2008 at 12:15 pm

  2. Tee hee.

    “uttering profanities against Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) is the worst form of human rights violation in the world.”

    “HRS recognizes the importance of freedom of conducting scientific research, exchange of information, and significance of the latest technologies and media on human lives, but it is against how ‘YouTube’ depicts Islam. He said this is an outright violation of the human rights of millions of Muslims all over the world.”

    Other significant human rights violations include all those red lights on my way to work, cancellation of my favorite TV shows, and people who disagree with me about anything.


    October 3, 2008 at 12:40 pm

  3. So if I’ve got this right, then disagreeing with people is the worst crime anyone can ever commit anywhere ever? Worse than murder? Then if I say “I disagree with everyone in China” is that as bad as genocide?

    Hang on, I’ll give it a try:
    “I disagree with everyone in China. And everyone in the Indian subcontinent. Also Spain.”

    Now I just have to sit back and wait for the people from the UN war crimes tribunal to come arrest me. You wait; for the crime I’ve just committed I’ll be more famous than Jesus.


    October 3, 2008 at 6:25 pm

  4. I guess “nukular” is the proper pronunciation according to the GOP public speech manual. After all, they don’t want the president to sound like an idiot alone.


    October 3, 2008 at 6:47 pm

  5. Very bold Manigen! You’re worse than Hitler and you’ve committed a crime against nearly half the world’s population. Why didn’t you just try disagreeing with Iceland or Monaco? The UN might have let you off with a community service order then, now you’re likely to get executed at least a couple of times.

    Isn’t if funny how god can’t deal with offensive statements, being omnipotent and all?


    October 3, 2008 at 7:30 pm

  6. To be fair, Biden has to stop saying ‘fundamental’ or any variants thereof. He started to get fucking annoying.


    October 3, 2008 at 10:17 pm

  7. @Crystal; these fuckers are serious


    October 3, 2008 at 10:25 pm

  8. Isn’t if funny how god can’t deal with offensive statements, being omnipotent and all?

    Oz, I never got that either. Why does he give a shit what anyone says about him? The joke’s on them in the end, right? God gets the last word every damn time, yet he gets his dick all twisted up in knots when someone says he’s a dumbass. Buh?

    Priest, he so does. And also “literally” and “my friend, John McCain.” Bah! Is it November 5 yet??

    Watercat, lawsie mercy…they are seriously, aren’t they? Yeebus. Shit like that gets me so depressed.


    October 3, 2008 at 11:42 pm

  9. From the article Watercat pointed to, about why saying bad things about the heavenly fairy is worse than murder:

    But one thing that the murderer cannot claim, is that the murdered was someone who provided him with food, shelter, clothing and all the other things which keep humans aloft in this life.

    WTF? There was never anybody who killed their parents, then? What a bunch of dumb (or deceitful) fucks.


    October 4, 2008 at 12:45 am

  10. Sorry, it’s not “saying bad things about the heavenly fairy”, but “praying to a different heavenly fairy” instead.


    October 4, 2008 at 12:58 am

  11. @watercat: In the article you mentioned, “SHIRK: THE ULTIMATE CRIME”, it starts out with:

    MURDER, rape, child molesting and genocide. These are all some of the appalling crimes which occur in our world today.

    The appalling thing is … Muhammad did all of these things!!! Were those crimes not appalling when Muhammad committed them? I guess Muslims — or at least some of them such as that author — just don’t give a damn. If Muhammad did it, then it wasn’t appalling. And at least he wasn’t guilty of shirk.


    But when a man commits shirk, the injustice is directed towards the Creator of the heavens and the earth: Allah.

    Allah can’t defend or take care of “him”self? Is he in a nursing home? Is he so weak he can’t even convince us he exists? Childish rubbish.

    Helluva way to start a Saturday morning.


    October 4, 2008 at 9:49 am

  12. Michael, my favorite excuses for the but-Mohammed-did-it thing:
    – He was perfect, so he couldn’t have done those things.
    – You can’t prove that he did any of that.
    – You’re a liar and you’re going to hell.
    – Everything he did was the will of God (to which I’d like to add, “Seriously??!??!??!?!?!”)

    You should do what I do. Skip the coffee, read the bullshit, THEN have coffee and fuggedaboutit. But, uh, I’mma post some other stuff that might agitate someone’s stomach bile. I got it from Andrew Sullivan’s blog, so that should already get someone’s panties in a knot. Whoo!

    Flailin’ Palin wasn’t such a Joe Six Pack back in the day. I don’t wanna flat out say the whole winking, nodding, gosh durnit thing is an act…but maybe? Betcha count = 0


    BTW, make sure and look out for the part where she doesn’t bat an eyelash as she says “I would choose life” when asked what she would do if her daughter was raped & became pregnant. I. Ai. Aye. Me. Boy, I bet it was really tough for Bristol Palin to “choose” life when she got knocked up.


    October 4, 2008 at 10:37 am

  13. Crap! What does “Betcha count = 0” mean? Blogspeak is only my second language.


    October 4, 2008 at 12:19 pm

  14. This is the ultimate form of ingratitude which humans display, and will eventually cause many people eternal pain.

    Hum, let me translate: god will hurt and kill his good followers if someone says something bad about him. Which is probably code for kill everyone doesn’t love Allah like we do.

    You know whats funny, you can’t get rid of all the bad people, no matter how many you kill, or even a significant number of them because that would contradict the bible and qurans end of days fantasy where there are at least as many or more bad people then good.


    October 4, 2008 at 12:36 pm

  15. Oz, I was referring to Sarah Palin’s catchphrases (betcha, Joe Six-Pack, gosh, darnit, etc). It’s driving me nuts. Nuts, I tell you!


    October 4, 2008 at 1:41 pm

  16. What most people don’t know is that, when Palin talks about Fannie and Freddie, she doesn’t mean the agencies. She means her wolf-hunting buddies.


    October 4, 2008 at 2:27 pm

  17. i’m going shirking this week, who’s with me??


    October 5, 2008 at 8:45 pm

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